LadyLoxley
"Two things must ye know about the Wise Woman!"

GlitTurkeyRock
Henry Silva. A man whose face makes one say "Is the aspect ratio on my DVD player set correctly?"

Indomitus
His head is shaped like a yam.

RodRocket
"Y'know, Alexandra Paul never did another nude scene in movies after this."
"Thank God."

Chrismahanakwanzafreak
"SUGARTITS?!?!"

Zee
Way to make your mouth look like a diseased baboon asshole, Pearl.

TheCarolingDiva
What a cheesecake sees.

jackrouters
While not a clever anagram for "Direct to video", it IS a clever anagram for "Alas! Unjust, frigid dream."

GlitTurkeyRock
"Quickly Sarah Tjane, back to the Tjardus!"

Yukon GARnelius
If she married Gray, she'd be Kelly Zombor-Zombie. And then she'd be dead, because Charisma would kill her. Or have Jason kill her.

Indomitus
But then she could be brought back to life, and she'd be a Zombie Zombor-Zombie.

YibbleGuy
And, if she were stolen away from Gray by the master of the pan flute, she'd be Zombie Kelly Zombor-Zombie-Zamfir.

TheCarolingDiva
And if she moved into the city from this movie, she'd be Zombie Kelly Zombor-Zombie-Zamfir of Ziox.

cajunmagic
But, sadly, she took her love of ice sweeping machines too far and became Zombie Kelly Zombor-Zombie-Zamfir-Zamboni of Ziox

jackrouters
Has the fleshy, well-molded figure of Mo Rocca.

TheCarolingDiva
Lemon mining is one of the most dangerous jobs in the world...

tinaw
Yeah, blood lemons are illegal in the U.S. . . .

GodoHell
...yet blood oranges are readily available. For shame!