Coakley
Ellen DeGeneres is right. He's not staying single for long.

cajunmagic
Wait. That's a him? I thought it was the mom from Malcolm in the Middle!

Zee
...Still more attractive than Elizabeth Perkins...

tinaw
*sigh*
I'm not having kids.

GlitterRock
www.charlenetiltonlaughingatshit.com

Dita DuPave
Michael Vick, Britney Spears...it was bad year for dogs.

Zee
Skin Cancer does help you stay slim.

Coakley
I would have cast her as Narcissa Malfoy. Who else could have landed a hunk like Jason Issacs?
...
I capped that out loud, didn't I?

TheDiva
Nothing like greeting the day in a brand new corset!

gleeb
"And still, I have no chair!"

AlexGariepy
Wow, my Notgiveashittery Meter went up through the roof. Did I miss something?

TheDiva
Well, at least there she can't make any movies...

Klatuu 7
I don't think Paris Hilton could complete a sentence. A sentence fragment maybe...

Indomitus
But if she did successfully complete a sentence, wouldn't it be news?

gleeb
Tearfully, she confesses to having once stayed at a Marriott.

Dita DuPave
Did she learn about conditioner during her jail time?

SweetHeart666
How will you contribute to society, Paris?
"I'll make sex tapes with the little people."

LadyLoxley
What the f*ck's that?